cold frontiers...

Hey Holly:

Sorry to hear about your hat. If I see it blowing around, I will grab it for you. However, with the gustiness here today, it's likely that it has headed up toward the North Pole by now. Here, as evidence, is a picture of my hair today...


... well, not today. Today, actually, it looks far worse than this. The sun has just come out, which is something. But my photo above reflects my general mood with this weather.

You asked about custard filled Timbits. I haven't seen those for years!!! I miss them. I, like you, suspect that they are being hoarded and don't make it to the counter. I had a Boston Cream this morning though... a good second alternative. I shall have to ask about the custard timbits tomorrow - you do the same next time you go. We'll get to the bottom of this, I assure you.

I hate to say it, but I think Durango Malt coolers have gone by the wayside as well. There are so many alcopops out right now, the malt stuff seems no longer popular. I'll be checking out some beer tonight at our Tenant Advocates gathering - Duty Counsel branch. Will raise a glass to you and your dearly departed hat!

You hussy, you - making a cross border trek at the tender age of 15?!? At 15, I don't remember what I was doing... probably chained to the stove making dinner for my little brother because my parents were at work. I did scoot down with some friends to Watertown NY a few times when I was 17 and 18 years old. Amazing how cheap the booze was down there, and how easy to buy when underage!!!

I take it you're worked on the Canajan accent since then?

Not too much new on this front. Work travels apace on the cardigan for JJ... and it's almost the weekend. Yippee!!!!

Take it easy,

Kristina

Cross that Border Hat

Dear Kristina,

How is Canada today? It's so windy in Michigan, and even though my math is bad, I pretty good with the directions and I've got a feeling that if you see a hat that looks like this...

the wind took it from me and I believe it's now somewhere near Buffalo and may make it up to your way by around 2 this afternoon.

I could always knit another, but really, why look back when there are so many more silly hats to fill the world with?

Speaking of filling, does Tim Hortons no longer make the custard filled Tim Bits, or are some evil donut girls hoarding all the good ones in their little aprons? Or am I required to ask special for the good ones?

Also, my love of Timmy's started when I was 15. I went on a cross border trek with an older boy not realizing that Canada is a great country full of donuts and beer. Oh, do they still make Durango, a weird Berry flavored malt beverage concoction?

Anyway, I was gleefully allowed into the country. But because of my very Michigan/Canadian border accent, it took several hours for me to regain enterance back into the states. Why? 15 year olds with older boyfriends who don't expect to leave the country don't carry their birth certificates with them when planning on going to a movie.

sundry distractions...

Hey Holly:

Thai food... mmm... you just had to say that, didn't you? Now I want to forego my blah ham sandwich that I brought and head out to the all you can eat Thai buffet up the street...

I can't say I'm sorry that you ended up going with the time-honoured tradition of the Hoser Hat. And I know what you mean about lame-o pickup attempts. The Friday-after-work venue of the Tenant Advocates of Toronto (high-falutin' name for a bunch of slobbily dressed lawyer bums who like a pint or five) is located too close to the business district and thus usually full of braying businessmen alternately slurping up free oysters and dropping pick up lines, sometimes at the same time. My table usually lays bets on when (not whether) a specific BB will utter a specific line. I usually lose because computerspeak causes me to nod off and fall face down into the pitcher of beer on the table.

Anyway, do go for the Shoot on Sight stitching!! Funnily enough, today I am wearing my safety orange Samus cardigan:


Our receptionists both shielded their eyes when I walked in this morning, and one of them has been putting on his shades every time I go out for a smoke (I hope he doesn't develop carpal tunnel syndrome, given the frequency of my outdoor high end legal consultations with other Tenant Advocates).

Come to think of it, I have some of that Super 3 left. However, I do not need any more Hoser Hats. Maybe I should make this type of hat instead?
Otherwise known as a Fargo Hat...?
YAH.

How do you think it would look with cables?

Hmm... must get on that. If you come across any patterns in your travels, please advise!

Back to the grind. SIGH.

Cheers,

Kristina

The Posh and the Hosers

Hey there Kristina!

My latest Beret was turned into a regular hat by accident! I was knitting while eating some awesome thai food and got distracted by spice. No, not a gaggle of actually Spice Girls, or look alike Posh Spice haircuts, I may have been distracted by this sort of cleavage...

Speaking of the Pob, I am just going to bow down and accept her sassy hair and rid my head of this accursed soccer mom do (doo doo.) It's making me very evil. I'm evil enough on my own. I carry a blooded zombie shovel for sheep's sake, I don't need more evil.

One table over was full of business men all computer speaking trying to talk big and pick up chicks. Yes, pick up chicks with their nerd speak lingo. In my haze of thai spice, and joy of lame pick up attempts, the 1 inch of 2x2 rib for her kicky beret pleasure turned into 4 inches of 2x2 rib for a regular old...



Hoser Hat.


Ah, perhaps it will still be a kicky hoser hat. It's in safety orange, so I think I am going to stitch in "Shoot on Sight" into it.

Deviant - the only way to go

Holly:

So sorry to hear about your forced PC training today. I have no doubt that you are now well placed to become a door greeting at a large department store which shall remain nameless.

As someone who works in the not-for-profit environment, I can certainly relate. In addition to all of the expensive paper containing my various designations, I have many, many diplomas from such "complaince" training (I'm saving it all in the event I ever get a bird...).

JJs workplace (a security company) is also going through an "image makeover" and he is getting tons of (what he calls) bumf with all this sort of jargon. You can only imagine how impressed he is with that. The latest missive was a "how do you really feel?" questionnaire together with a big box with photos of trees taking up half a page to give the message "Support our greening initiative - allow us to correspond with you by Email instead. We require that you provide us with your Email address on or before 30 November 2007."

WELL.

As you can imagine, this provoked quite the rant. It started off as "As far as I'm concerrrrrrned, they can uproot all those trrrrrees and stick them up their collective arses...and how many bloody trrrees have they killed thus far to send me a bunch o' this crrrap... Ah tell yew...". It is still continuing.

They did not get JJs Email address (he doesn't actually have one). Instead, they got a very very strong letter indeed - drafted by His Master's Voice and taken in person to his head office before he went to work this morning.

Oh - as for your training -sometimes it's better to subvert from within. You can really use that nonsense to play some mighty head games.

And - I went back to the LYS today (surprise surprise). Escaped relatively unscathed - two skeins of Super 10:... and the IK mag from Winter 2005. Oh, and three FREE pattern books!! :-)

When are you coming up for our yarncrawl? - might want to save it until spring at this point. Today we had a freak snowstorm where it was actually snowing SIDEWAYS. Spooky.

Non illegitimi carborundum (don't let the bastards grind you down...) and goddess-speed with the beret!

Cheers,

Kristina

Compliant and Inclusive, alas, still Deviant...

Dear Friend in the Mighty Frozen North Kristina,

I have been in forced "Safety, Inclusive, Diversity, and Compliance" training. How do I feel? Super happy and ready to serve! Are you kidding, I refused to eat or drink anything and hid in a corner knitting...Resistance may be Futile, but drinking the Kool-Aid is just giving up.

So, what am I working on now? Well, I'm not burning dinner. No cleaning. You're right if you've guessed...jaunty beret!!

So jealous of your LYS trip.

spending spree

Hi Holly:

In response to your comment below, I think the Ogre's use of "jaunty" to describe your beret is perfect. Make many, many more... !

The button purchase went fine. Alas (I guess, anyway), and perhaps not surprising, I ended up acquiring a skein of Handmaiden and one of Fleece Artist. You can see the whole sorry story on my blog. Basically, Evil Kristina came out to play.

Would you stop sending your cold fronts up here, please? I got soaked yesterday during my little detour to the LYS.

Preparing for a long, boring day at work. Meetings, meetings, meetings. I hate bureaucracy. At least I can take my knitting: JJs cardigan in progress (as seen above). Aren't I so generous! Christmas is coming (and it's my nameday too!) and still knitting for others.

I rawk. But then you must really rawk because you do all that charity knitting stuff.

Better head for the subway before it starts getting too crowded. I wouldn't want to accidentally poke someone who was braying loudly into their cell phone with my knitting needles, would I???

Cheers,

Kristina

Monday morning blues...

Dear Holly: I'm so glad to hear what a purist you are respecting the use of certain three letter words beginning with "a" and ending with "s". I'm not as much as a purist as you, and tend to use variants such as "jack@$$". I really do think, however, that you should patent the term "recycled robot asses".

You've probably seen this particular variant of "ass" on line: I never had until a colleague posted it on the work listserve the other day, in the context of discussing a certain local paraweasel who shall remain nameless. My colleague wrote: "...Hopefully, they will soon realize what an @$$#0|e [X ]is..". I must have laughed for about half an hour. Wish I'd thought of it!

Given how great your beret looks on you, I really think you should take up knitting them almost exclusively. I would myself, but given that I look like this when wearing a beret:

... I think I'd best focus on other headgear (such as a knitted "brown paper bag" with eyeholes, perhaps) . For my part, for a change I decided to do something for another and knit a vest for JJ (who bought me the yarn for it, oh... maybe three months ago?!). Also stupidly started a multicoloured scarf with the rest of the sock yarn left on the miniatures. It takes approximately 15 minutes to finish one row. At this rate, the scarf will be ready for Christmas... 2025!

I hasten to say that I have not been knitting with piano wire (although might as well have been, frankly). This pleasure is left to a MIL from hell (not mine, gladly - one benefit to living with someone twice your age is... no inlaws!!!!).

I think I now know what knitting tastes like, having been too lazy to head to Tim's this morning and gotten an orange cruller at Coffee Time instead. Now at work, reading number 64 of approximately 2,000 recent housing law decisions (at the same time I'm composing this post, too. Aren't I a genius??). Bored, bored, bored and it's only Monday at 10:00 a.m.

Oh, SHUT UP, Kristina!!!


That's better.

Very envious of your Brit chocolate collection. However, in three weeks' time I'll be in London and will get to buy all the Brit chocolate I can afford!!! hee hee hee

Heading to the LYS at lunch hour - to buy buttons only. Yes, you heard it here first. I'm going to the yarn store but will not be buying any yarn. (The co-workers have a pool running on the outcome of this trip, I'm advised. I don't know the odds. Probably 1,000 to 1!)

Cheers,

Kristina

Use of the Word Ass, in the Classic Manner...

Dear Kristina,

Ah yes, the weird use of the word ass. I myself am a purist in the use of the word. As in, I fell on my ass, or I am making an ass of myself. I have recently used the phrase "recycled robot asses." But I was in fact talking about how a plastic bag was so stinky it smelled like it may have been made out of actual robot asses. So, again, real ass, not weird slang ass usage.

Now, you are done with the mosaic for awhile, you've been knitting with piano wire, which in my current evil phase would just temp me to go off the zombies and straight to humans...and you are hitting the stash and going for a crochet pageboy cap?

I'm thinking I may start exclusively knitting zombie/skull/French/Patriotic/Pastry inspired berets and baby sweaters. It sounds totally unrelated, but I'm always hungry, I love the kicky beret, and golly, baby stuff knits up quick, but unlike the piano wire knits, too large to eat.

Sincerely,
Holly B

University level chat... continued.

Dear Holly:

What is it with this term "ass" that I've been hearing all the time lately, anyway, as in "that's so ass"? Can you explain it to me? Man, sometimes I feel way too old - a 29 year old like you wouldn't be able to relate, I'm sure.

About Labatt Blue - here I think it was always sold in brown bottles. All the beer here was actually sold in stubby bottles until the late 80s or so - all brown. Then they also had quart bottles. (I don't know what happened to those - I rather like them). Now a bunch of these facnier beers come in clear bottles but some real beerhounds (unlike myself - just a beer pup) have said to avoid those ones as the light destroys the taste of the beer.

So, maybe that's the reason for getting rid of the green? Or, perhaps it's a Tim Bits conspiracy, as you say.

I am off the mosaics again, having completed an insane amount of unspecified gifts for people... (can't post because some of the people read the blog). The kicky beret sounds good! I'm going to be starting a pageboy cap by Stitch Diva maybe today. Have to finish my MDK tribute collection first, of course.

Just got back from the evil Loblaws. It was the first time in a while that I've managed to get there at the same time as JJ - meaning I could stack up on 10 bags of szechuan chips instead of two, as he was paying. It is also the first time JJ has been on a weekend in a long time - usually he goes during the week on his off days. We've been back half an hour now and he is still ranting on about ignoramuses (ignorami?) walking through the store shouting on cell phones, although he has finally gotten off the topic of "why does President's Choice make their sausage rolls with CHICKEN?!?!". That's just ass. :-)

I think that you and I should make it a point to hit La Belle Province sometime soon. There must be a LYS or two in Montreal - and the alcohol is cheap!!! And available in corner stores, unlike here where we must trek to the Store of Liquors or the Beer Store.

And - rest assured - you never have to drink alone. I will always be glad to hoist a pint or three with you - and we're even in the same time zone. Keep up the evil Holly and have fun fun fun. Vive le Dimension 49th!!!

Back to the MDK project now... am getting sick of it and must finish.

College Level Bloggers!!!

Dear Kristina,

I have been saying ass a lot on my blog lately. I think that's why I am in, did you say, Junior High? As for our College Level 49th Dimension abilities, it's all the potty talk and beer!

Speaking of beer, when I was a young lass, I would only drink the LaBatt Blue, back when it was imported into the States in the Mighty Green Bottle. They stopped the green bottle and switched to brown sometime in the early 90's. I have been confused ever since. Why did they do that? Do you know? Flavor, money, a Tim Bits conspiracy?

As for crafting in the North, have you moved off the mosaics and back to wool due to all the cold fronts we have been sending your way? I have just finished a kicky beret.

You know, in case I decide to viva le quebec in the near future. Actually it's to hide this bad hair until I can get in and have the rest cut with a straight razor. Really. The bad Brady Bunch Mom hair is letting the evil Holly out. It's fun, but soon I will have no one left to knit with. I will soon be drinking alone.

Which, looks bad.

blog education...?

Dear Holly:

I must say that I find myself very perturbed by this blog education rating system I came across on Wannietta's blog.

As you will see in the sidebar, our blog here is rated as "college level", whereas my own blog is rated as:


Sheesh! Makes me wonder why I bothered to shell out all those big bucks for law school... and this when I've been trying for all this high-level sophisticated comedy on the blog!!!! SIGH.

But now I'm getting really confused (nothing changes!!!) because when I checked to see what level your blog was at, I got this:


I won't mention how jealous I am that you have higher level writing skills than I (suffice it to say that it is very hard to type when one is busy chewing one's arm off...). But what I find odd is how an elementary school level writer like myself and a junior high school level writer like you can come up with this college-level blog.

Do you think that this forms proof of intelligent life in The 49th Dimension?!?

Cheers,

Kristina

Canajan cold fronts?

Hey Holly: I take it you haven't recovered yet from the wine, mayo and smoked turkey combo last evening. For my part I've got the mid-afternoon munchies and seem to have consumed my entire stash - aside from a packet of sesame snaps, which seem too healthy right now. SIGH.

I had a good laugh when I visited Amy's blog today.
And this all the way down in Oklahoma. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that just north of Texas??? We Canadians get blamed for everything! And all because of some squeaky voiced cartoon dweebs:


So, yes, yes, Blame Canada! I don't care because I ... AM ... CANADIAN!!!


This is a screenshot from an old ad campaign for this brand of beer: The guy, who was nicknamed Joe Canadian, used to go on and rant about the differences between Canadians and Americans. Some of us found it quite amusing - but there are two things about it which highlight the schizoid "don't know who we really are - British or American?" nature of the Canadian public:

(a) it took a beer ad to get people thinking patriotically about themselves in this country; and
(b) the motivating beer ad stopped airing in 2005. Why? Because Molson has now merged with Coors (an American company).

Bastards. Good thing I drink Keith's IPA.

Molson is swill. Here is the father of Keith's, Alexander, himself.



He looks a lot cooler than Joe Canadian above, too. And very obviously a true Canadian.

But wait! What's this I see in the blurb about him?

A young Scottish immigrant, Alexander Keith established his Halifax brewery at the age of 25 years.

He's from SCOTLAND?!?!? JJ will never let me live it down. Sigh.

Is this YOUR fault? you wannabe Canajan, you?

Detroit malls hand cross-border shoppers US$20

Nov 22, 2007 04:16 PM
THE CANADIAN PRESS
WINDSOR – The chairman of the Downtown Windsor Business Improvement Association is not happy with a cross-border shopping promotion.

Tomorrow, anyone heading into the U.S. at the Windsor-Detroit Tunnel will receive a $20 gift card that can be used at four Detroit shopping malls.

The day after American Thanksgiving marks the beginning of the Christmas shopping season south of the border with door-crasher deals and big sales.

It's dubbed "Black Friday" because the day is traditionally when stores became profitable.

The business improvement association chairman Larry Horwitz says Canadians need to resist the urge and shop locally.

He says he thinks the city of Detroit should intervene and stop the promotion.
********

You caused this, didn't you, Holly? You just want to drive up to Windsor and meet more canajans! Nice try! :-)

Happy Smoked Turkey day

Holly: an excellent call on the smoked turkey - better than real turkey any time! (I only like the leftovers from the turkey myself.

But - carnage is not the only thing that Thanksgiving is about. I send to you some virtual "produce" from Canada's favourite "field":

Appetizer

Entree


Beverage to Wash it Down - doubledoubles!!


Then there's dessert, of course...

What is up with "dry Thanksgiving" anyway? Isn't it written in your constitution somewhere: We hold these truths to be self evident... that relatives/inlaws + holiday stress = booze???

So, take the wine and Hellmans. Quite right. If there's any beef you let me know and I will write a very, very strong letter indeed!

Happy holiday!

Kristina

You Know I Want a Tim Bit Nation!

Oh, in a perfect world, there would be no more zombies, a good yarn store within walking distance, solar power for all, and White Castle and Tim Horton's would get married and make the perfect fast food union...only here people, in the

49th Dimension!

Sorry Kristina, but I spoke with my mother in law last night and I was informed that Thanksgiving was going to be a "dry" event this year. After much shock, amazement and choking on my deep fried sweet potatoes (a festive treat) I said this...

"With all the zombies I have been fighting while you were off in New York for the last 5 years, not to mention the charity knitting I've had to do and slap your name on it to keep you in good graces at the Grange, the one thing I am Thankful for is the sweet, sweet cheapness of Californian hooch! This will not be a dry Thanksgiving. I will also not bow down to Miracle Whip!"

Since I burn all that I cook, I ordered a smoked turkey from the smoke house down the road, and the Ogre was in charge of pies.


This here is what I'm bringing....




That's just what I'm bringing for me. Screw the rest of the fam.

a timbit nation! and Thanksgiving centrepiece

Holly:

The true name for someone from Windsor, according to my source, is a Windsorite. Do commit it to memory so's you can "pass"...my smart@$$ friend Kenn (the one who told me that "people from Windsor" = "people who want to move to Trana ASAP) said that you can contact him if you want to learn the secret handshake.

For those who are not familiar with the wonder that is Tim Hortons (or Timmy's, as some of us lovingly call it), here is an explanatory blurb (gotta love Wikipedia!):

Tim Hortons franchise stores are plentiful in Canadian cities and towns. As of July 1, 2007, there were 2,733 outlets in Canada and 345 outlets in the United States.

Tim Hortons has supplanted McDonald's as Canada's largest food service operator; it has nearly twice as many Canadian outlets as McDonald's, and its system-wide sales surpassed those of McDonald's Canadian operations in 2002. The chain accounted for 22.6% of all fast food industry revenues in Canada in 2005.

Tim Hortons commands 76% of the Canadian market for baked goods (based on the number of customers served) and holds 62% of the Canadian coffee market (compared to Starbucks, in the number two position, at 7%)[emphasis added]

And guess what? They have outlets in Michigan!! According to Tim's website they are currently hiring at their locations in Adrian, Canton and Saline, Michigan - in case you're interested... :-) It's never too young to send the Pigs to work to bring in some craft cash, methinks.

They even have an outlet at CFB Kandahar - they pay $1,000/week tax-free over there or so I've heard. But that might be a little far to commute.

I know that you have a big holiday tomorrow - sorry I'm so delayed getting this centrepiece idea to you, but if you start now you should have it done in time:


A turkey made from tampons!!! The website also has the following crafts which should be of interest to you:

(a) a menorah! (for that demanding Piglet who might want to celebrate both Chanukah and Christmas this year...)

and

(b) an addition for your zombie-fighting arsenal.


So - get craftin'!!! :-)

And a happy turkey day to you - with or without tampons...

Cheers,

Kristina

PS. Do check out the Soo - I was just there on business and they have the best Value Village I've ever been in. And I've been in (quite a) few...

Detroit has a Skyline too...that over looks at Beautiful Windsor

Damn you clever Canadians, you got me, and all the good candy and high alcohol content beer, not to mention Tim Hortons. I hail from Michigan, which in fact makes me a Michigander.

What the hell is a true Windsorian, Windsanian, Windorigasorian? I need to know when I travel abroad to complete the story, oh, it's a lie.

It's the same way in Niagra. The US side has the crappy view of the falls, you have the scenic beauty, the good candy, the beer, and Tim Hortons. Dunkin Donuts is not an acceptable substitute.

I'm going to have to go test my theory out at other famed crossing points. Watch out Sault Ste. Marie, I'm going to test your border candy, beer and donuts. Good thing I have a passport.

If you're from Windsor then what do you call yourself?

Hi Holly:

Well, I'm glad to hear that you don't even heat your house. I have no such compunctions because my heat is included in my rent (having said that, we still do put up plastic on the windows, like idiots... the other tenants all gossip about us and say "what's that, plastic wrap? Isn't that against the lease? Oh, no... it says "no tin foil in the windows" in the lease)...

I gather that the final "werewolf" excuse you gave the Pigs as to why you don't hang lights is the one that worked for them? If they want, they can come up here and see all the elaborate Christmas light shows they want in my neighbourhood... and this in a primarily Jewish neighbourhood. One out of every ten houses probably uses 10,000 watts per minute of energy what with lighting up Santa, all the reindeer and the nativity scene besides. The other nine houses out of the ten all probably wince...

Hoping and trusting that you got your @$$ out the door to spend the gift cert to the LYS... perhaps it was just anticipation of what to buy that kept you hanging on to it?

I do have to address something from your last subject line where you indicated that you were actually from Windsor, ON (current home of one casino and 55 peeler bars). I have a little quiz for you: if you are from Windsor, what are people from Windsor called?

Examples: I am originally from Kingston and was a Kingstonian until I moved to Toronto when I became a Torontonian. (Or a Tranian, if you go with the local pronunciation.)

Other Canajan examples:

Halifax = Haligonian
Montreal = Montrealer or Montrealaise (sp?) depending on which official language you speak.
Winnipeg = Winnipeger
Calgary = Calgarian
Vancouver = Vancouverite
Victoria = Victorian? (I couldn't get anyone from Victoria to give me a straight answer to this query.

I then consulted JJ for Scottish/Irish/British examples:

Glasgow = Glaswegian
Edinburgh = wanker (he then corrected himself and said "Edinburgher"
Dundee = Dundonian
Dublin = Dubliner
London = Londoner (same as in London, Ontario)
Liverpool = Liverpudlian (or Scouser)
Newcastle = Geordie
Birmingham = Brummer
Manchester = Mancunian

All this to say, we both racked our brains and couldn't figure out what people from Windsor are called.

So I consulted the two people I know who hail originally from Windsor what the term is for people from Windsor. The first, who is known for his acerbic sense of humour said: "the people who get the %#($*)@$( out to Trana as soon as humanly possible".

That wasn't helpful. The second person gave me the correct answer. So, if you can tell me what it is, then you will be a true Windsor... person indeed! Addiction to Tim Horton's doesn't cut it :-)

Cheers,

Kristina

Don't Blame that Crap on ME! I'm from Windsor...

Oh, we don't do lights on our house. We don't even heat our house. We had an energy savings audit done, and the guy laughed and asked me how we were using so little energy. I said "knitting."

The Pigs asked why we don't hang up lights. I tried to tell them we were saving the world. They didn't buy it. I then went on to say that the neighbors were glory hounds and were just trying to show off and that they probably used plastic shopping bags and incandescent light bulbs and Santa didn't deliver gifts to people who waste. I finally said the lights attract werewolves.

That's why we hang a wreath. A wreath left over from clippings we gather from the ground and string together ourselves. LIE. A wreath that is purchased from a pagan tree lot grown on a spot of land just down wind from the evil pharmaceutical company. That way the wreath glows in the dark, and may have a longer than four hour erection.

I got a "you are my bff, thanks for knitting my kids weird stuff, here's a gift certif to a LYS." I don't know why I'm still here...it needs spent.

Carmen Miranda lives!

(well, not really - but I figured I had to inject some Canadian content or "Cancon".

This is one of our big "Can Cons" from the 80s - Brian Mulroney, former Conservative Prime Minister. He's been in the news of late again due to some questionable past associations with an arms dealer currently facing extradition to Germany. So, meet "Carmen Mulroney">



The Man in the Moon is our current PM, Harper. He's not best pleased with Mulroney these days, despite the cheesy grin.

comics: the life of Brouhaha and JJ

Hi Holly: couldn't resist posting these here... please read with a liberal grain of salt!





Cheers,

Kristina

global warming and other foolishness

So, Holly:

Given the use of large scale equipment to hang Christmas lights, I gather that we up here have Murcans to blame for no snowfall and 20 degree C temperatures in November. Which, mind you, that I wouldn't carp about, except that when one day it's 20 C and you're hanging on the patio and the next day it's minus 2, it's difficult to plan the day's fashion choices.

For my part, I save all that bother by not decorating at all. My excuse: part of a deep seated trauma resulting by having gotten an electric shock when trying to change a burned out Christmas lightbulb - I fell off a ladder into about 3 feet of snow on my front lawn. I was twelve at the time and had been forced by my very cruel father to do this. I protested strongly - but how to respond when the response to "I don't wanna, dad?!?!?!?" is "When I was your age, I was walking to school one day and saw a bunch of people hanging from trees where the Germans had left them. And then I got home from school where they beat us routinely every day, and only got to eat a crust of stale bread because there was a war on. And you think you have it rough??"

There is no response, really. Anyway, it's all good because as a result I have gotten out of changing lightbulbs for the rest of my life. Which is a good thing, because I don't know how to.

And, as for Christmas decorating, the only Christmas decoration I like is this one:



and my cruel mother will not release it from her possession (my brother made it when he was in kindergarten. You may think it is a highly ironic and precocious artistic commentary, but in fact it only reflected the fact that he looks like this:
I'm serious. He's probably about the same height too. Which is why I'm not scared that he will come here from out in BC and pound my head in should he ever actually read this...


But back to your post. I thought I did see the Notre Dame Jesus in that photo, actually!!! Am I hallucinating?

Very glad to hear that there is hope for Pig 3. I wish (as I have wished so many times before) that I had kept the copy of "Sex and the Believing Boy" given to my ex (after we had lived together in a bachelor apartment for a YEAR, mind you!) by his holier-than-the-Pope parents. This, in several years' time, might well cure Pig 1 of any Catholic yearnings. As for Pig 2, I would gladly ship down some Hanukkah gelt but I suspect it would either get spent or eaten by Santa Postie. SIGH.

Why am I rambling? Because I'm bored. I am trying to download a free trial of Photoshop so that I can enter Rick Mercer's Photo Challenge and morph this picture:


(of a former Prime Minister who has recently been back in the news for some scandal or other... it's hard to keep track).

Two problems with this plan:

(a) the free download is not cooperating; and
(b) I don't know how to use Photoshop.

In the meantime, I have amused myself by destroying this law text for an art project:


How satisfying! It's now down from about 450 pages to about 70. Wish I had thought of this years ago...

Meanwhile, JJ is watching a Lara Croft Tomb Raider movie for about the 57th time. And he is wondering why I'm not paying attention! (although when I suggested that perhaps he thought Angelina Jolie was prettier and sexier than me, his answer was "Almost, my darlin' almost...". Ah, these silver-tongued Irish...er, Scots.

Well, I see that Photoshop is finally finished downloading so I'd best get to it. Oh, I also put together a couple of comics with this Comic Shop programme I forgot about. I e-mailed them to you for a chuckle as I can't figure out how to upload them here. Any thoughts?

Cheers,

Kristina

It's just stupid

This may be a waste of energy. Hanging Holiday decor with heavy machinery. Would a ladder have done the job? This is why there is an energy crisis. Yes, my friends, this is what's going on in the States.


KB, what would you do with this lovely? It's pretty, and orange, but it needs that little something-something to perk it up. I'm keeping it, I've got my eye on it, it's got potential.


This is over in Indiana. On Notre Dame's campus. We wanted to see touch down Jesus,
but I guess you have to get out of the car and into the stadium to get a good look. We weren't that into it.

But now, we have one Pig who wants to be the next Rudy, or just be Catholic so he can go into the Golden Dome, and another Pig who wants to celebrate Hanukkah so that he can get more gifts. Luckily one kid takes after me and he wants to be a bag designing zombie slayer.

Foolproof Thanksgiving Recipes

Hey Holly: in case you're doing the cooking during your upcoming holiday...
Gracie Allen's Recipe for Roast Beef:

Ingredients:
1 large beef roast
1 small beef roast

Instructions
First, take the two roasts and put them in the oven.

When the little one burns, the big one is done.

I don't see why this principle would not work equally for turkey.

A suggestion, though: try to avoid this situation:


(for a full "what not to do", check out Merry Christmas, Mr. Bean).

Happy Turkey Day in advance...

kb

new FO and a UFO

Hey Holly:

Just thought I'd show you what my Smirnoff Ice and I got up to last evening while watching "Diehard with a Vengeance" for perhaps the 50th time... I think JJ believes that Bruce Willis is a living reincarnation of him... that doesn't sound right but you know what I mean...
First, I made what might be the world's smallest Curve of Pursuit blanket! (4 inches by 4 inches). Here it is pictured right smack-dab in the middle of my original Curve!

And, this is the proud new arrival:

How much do you think I could charge for these if I laminated them and sold them as beer coasters? Hmm...

And secondly, my mosaic made from the Goodwill acquisition yesterday:

This is still in progress. Originally I was going to leave it as is but I think it looks a tad bland.

Now off to clean the living room (really!)

Cheers,

Kristina

acquisitions and an imminent merger

Hey Holly -

Hope the day is treating you well, and trust that you have not been eaten by a zombie or any such foolish thing.

My day is going swimmingly thus far. First order of the day was to clean the bedroom:

And did I? Did I hell.

Instead, I blogged ... then blogged some more... then worked on my subversive pinko art piece.

Then, of course, it was time to go shopping (the Payday holiday has been a three day spending extravaganza, even by my standards)!

First, the daily stop at the health food provisioners to pick up some energy bars and other healthy items:

Next stop, the LYS, where the fabulous Haley, as promised, had some cheery coloured fingering weight cotton in stock (she called it "Kristina coloured" on the phone yesterday when I checked it...)

Dale Svale Stork - on sale for $3.90/ball!!!

What's it for? I'll give you a hint... not socks. Stay tuned...

Then, after a boring stop at Shoppers, I hit the Goodwill. Here's what I scored there:

A novel by one of the Blackadder writers... and some neckties!

And, even better...
$2.99 for the fancy gerbara ornament and $4.50 for the china pieces (at my LMS - conveniently located right across the street from the Goodwill! Will be having a little wedding ceremony for these two this evening.

And, lest you think I'm completely selfish, I feel I was quite fair in purchasing for JJ. He gets dinner tonight:

... Scottish energy bars and elixir:



... and tomorrow's brekkie for him to take to work:

And here's my brekkie for tomorrow:
On the way home out of the LCBO I ran into one of my buddies. She suggested we grab a pint at a pub across the street called - wait for it - the Duke and Daisy - she's a regular there but I hadn't been before. Cozy place, and the price was right - and of course, you can't drink just one...

By the time I staggered back to my place, I had decided to take a detour to the back of the building just to doublecheck the Treasures from Trash situation. And, lo and behold:

Glassware!
A funky Judas candle (not that Judas - another one)!

... and even a whole pizza!!

(just kidding about the pizza. I had ordered it when heading over to the LCBO and said I'd be back to pick it up in half an hour. Of course, I then got sidetracked. I'm lucky it was still waiting for me two hours later!)

I couldn't manage to get the booty upstairs what with all the other bags of goodies, so I ran up, left the bags, and rushed back down as quickly as possible.

During that minute-long interval, however, the door leading out to the back ended up locked. Foiled again by Mario, the superintendent!!!!
However, I figured out the quickest alternate route and ran, suspecting I would find Mario munch my pizza - but the stuff was still there.

And... I found my lucky lighter on the balcony!
A tremendous day.